Nice People - Is not what the world needs now!

Nice people is not what the world really needs right now!

I realise that is an unusual thing to say however recently after enrolling in a 16 month Leadership program run by Integrity and Values I was given an insight into the concept of "Nice" and how much it costs us in terms of relationships and career opportunities.

Another meaning to the word "Nice" as it was explained to me is as follows:

• Nothing
• In me
• Cares
• Enough (to tell you the truth)

What this is in fact saying is that if you really care about someone you actually owe it to them to tell them the truth about behaviours and paradigms that may be working against them as long as you understand how to deliver the message respectfully and honestly.
I remember Jack Welch (former CEO of General Electric) saying that the most common frustration of his in business was the fact that very few leaders actually give honest assessments of their team members during performance appraisal sessions and generally play the "nice" card which makes little difference to the daily performance of the person yet may have a significant impact on their future career aspirations.
Take an example of someone who reguarly repeats what they say so that the information becomes boring and annoying as well as repetitive. It can be difficult to tell someone that this is the case when they talk to you yet (if you care enough about them) without telling them about this how many people may they annoy and alienate in their life and business pursuits.

I often ask people to describe how "nice" people behave and almost without exception they are described as non confrontational and less than honest about revealing their true feelings and opinions.

With respect to the skills of emotional intelligence (EI) the first pre requisite is to be able to understand your own emotions and then manage them so having trusted people around you who will tell you the unadulterated truth in a respectful way is actually what the world really needs now!